

Many mothers and fathers struggle with their children's temper tantrums, especially when the child screams, cries, or refuses to listen. The situation can be exhausting and frustrating, and sometimes it leads to shouting or punishment without finding a real solution. But have you ever tried looking at the problem from a different angle? The solution isn't always about punishment or threats. Sometimes, the answer can be simple and easy: breathing exercises.
Today, we'll talk about how breathing exercises can help a child calm down and manage their anger, and how parents can use them at home in a fun and easy way. These exercises are not only beneficial psychologically, but they also help the child become more aware of themselves and their emotions, which strengthens their relationship with their parents. Follow along with the article to learn about the most effective exercises and how to apply them with your child step by step.
Breathing exercises are suitable for children aged two and older, as long as the child can wait for a minute without fidgeting. At this age, children start to understand simple instructions and imitate what they see, which is a great time to teach them how to calm themselves down during moments of anger or stress.
If you notice any of the following behaviors in your child, these are likely signs of a tantrum:
Tensing their body or stiffening up.
Screaming or crying loudly.
Kicking their legs or hitting someone nearby.
Holding their breath sometimes.
Breaking things or throwing themselves on the ground.
Arching their back or throwing themselves.
Complaining constantly or being dissatisfied with everything.
These are all signs that your child is unable to express their feelings verbally, so they release them through violent or hysterical behavior.
Tantrums in young children are completely normal, especially during the toddler years. Here's how to handle them effectively:
Stay calm no matter what.
Avoid getting into a power struggle with your child.
Give them space to express their feelings, but within limits.
Teach them alternatives to express discomfort (like drawing or breathing).
When they calm down, praise their positive behavior and encourage them.
The goal is not to prevent anger, but to teach them how to express it in a safe and healthy way.
At 4 years old, it's normal for a child to have anywhere from one to four tantrums per day. This is part of their emotional and psychological development, as they are still learning how to control their emotions. However, if these tantrums are occurring frequently or very violently, it might be a good idea to consult a pediatrician or a child psychologist.
If your child enters a hysterical state, try these steps:
First, calm down yourself… as children can sense the mother's energy.
Speak to them in a calm, reassuring voice.
Encourage them to express how they feel, either with words or through drawing.
You might hug them… physical touch can help soothe them.
Distract them with something they love (a toy, a book, drawing).
Try deep breathing exercises if they are able to engage.
There are tools called "Body Socks" that help children feel secure. They provide a gentle pressure around the body, which stimulates the release of oxytocin, known as the "hug hormone." This hormone helps with relaxation and promotes a sense of safety and comfort, especially for sensitive children.
Have you tried teaching your child breathing exercises? Believe me, simple breathing exercises can be a magical tool that helps children and teens improve their mental health and physical well-being in a safe and natural way.
Let’s explore together the benefits of breathing exercises for children and teens:
Calming Stress and Anxiety
Deep breathing exercises relax the body and calm the nerves, helping children and teens feel more peaceful, especially during stressful times like exams or difficult situations.
Improving Focus and Attention
When a child focuses on their breath, their mind clears, allowing them to concentrate better in school or during study time.
Controlling Emotions
These exercises teach children how to calm down instead of reacting impulsively, which is very important when they’re upset or frustrated.
Deeper and Better Sleep
A few simple breathing exercises before bedtime can help a child fall asleep faster and feel more rested during the night.
Enhancing Self-Awareness
Breathing exercises make children more aware of their body, breath, and emotions, helping them understand themselves better and behave more appropriately.
Supporting Physical Health
Deep breathing brings more oxygen to the body, which strengthens the immune system and improves circulation.
Boosting Self-Confidence
When children learn to control their emotions through breathing, they feel strong and capable of facing any challenge.
Improving Relationships with Others
The calmness that children gain from breathing exercises helps them interact more kindly, reducing conflicts with those around them.
Regulating Hormones in Teenagers
During adolescence, the body undergoes rapid changes. Deep breathing helps reduce mood swings and provides emotional balance.
Managing Anger or Panic Attacks
If a child is experiencing anxiety or anger, breathing exercises are a quick and effective tool to calm the body and mind.
A Great Start for Meditation and Mindfulness
These exercises can be a first step toward meditation (mindfulness), which strengthens mental health in the long run.
Reducing Study and Exam Stress
Students are often under pressure. Breathing exercises can reduce this pressure, helping them study calmly and with more focus.
Improving Sports Performance
For those who love sports, proper breathing helps the body endure and perform without getting fatigued quickly.
Learning Patience and Self-Control
The exercises teach children to take their time before reacting, promoting wisdom and calmness.
Helping Children with Hyperactivity and ADHD
Children with hyperactivity or attention issues benefit from these exercises, as they help them calm down and focus better, especially when part of a daily routine.
Stimulating Creativity and Positive Thinking
When the mind is relaxed, children start to be more creative, whether it’s through drawing, writing, or solving problems in a smarter way.
Belly breathing exercises are not only a great way to calm down but also help children manage their emotions and anxiety. Here are simple steps to teach your child belly breathing in a fun way:
Choose a Quiet Place
Have the child sit in a quiet and comfortable place, away from noise and distractions. It's best if the location is a cozy room or even on their bed.
Use Toys or Imagination
If the child is young, place a light toy like a small teddy bear on their belly and say:
"Let’s make the teddy bear go up and down with your breath without moving your chest."
If they are a bit older, tell them:
"Imagine there’s a balloon inside your belly, and with each deep breath, the balloon inflates."
Explain the Difference Between Chest and Belly Breathing
Have the child place one hand on their chest and the other on their belly. Show them that their belly should rise and fall with each breath, not their chest.
Start Together
Ask the child to inhale (breathing through the nose) for 4 seconds while inflating their belly, hold the breath for 2 seconds, and then exhale slowly through the mouth for 6 seconds while tightening their belly.
Repeat the Exercise Several Times
Begin with 3 to 5 repetitions, and gradually increase as they get more comfortable. Repetition is key for the child to get used to breathing correctly.
Link the Exercise to Specific Situations
Try using the breathing exercise during specific situations like before bedtime, before an exam, or when the child is feeling stressed. This helps make it a natural habit when needed.
Balloon Breathing
The child imagines they are inflating a big balloon.
Inhale through the nose for 4 seconds.
Exhale slowly through the mouth as if blowing up the balloon.
Repeat the exercise 4 times.
Flower / Candle Breathing
Flower Breathing: Inhale through the nose as if smelling a flower.
Candle Blowing: Exhale slowly through the mouth as if blowing out a candle.
This simple and fun exercise is especially enjoyable for kids when told in a storytelling manner.
Box Breathing (Great for older kids, 7 years and up)
Inhale for 4 seconds.
Hold the breath for 4 seconds.
Exhale for 4 seconds.
Rest for 4 seconds.
Repeat the exercise 3 times.
Belly Breathing (Diaphragmatic Breathing)
The child lies on their back, places a hand or a toy on their belly.
They inhale slowly through the nose until the toy rises, and then exhale slowly through the mouth until the toy falls.
This is an excellent relaxation exercise before bed.
Bumblebee Breath
Inhale through the nose.
Exhale through the mouth while making a "zzzz" sound like a bee.
This exercise calms the nerves and makes kids laugh!
Train Breathing
The child imagines they are a train.
Inhale with a "tshhhh" sound.
Exhale with a "chug-chug" sound.
This is a fun and imaginative exercise.
Cat and Dog Breathing
Cat: Take a long breath in as if stretching.
Dog: Exhale quickly, like a dog sticking out its tongue and running.
This exercise helps teach kids the difference between slow and fast breathing in a physical way.
Alternate Nostril Breathing
This exercise helps improve focus and relaxation.
How to do it:
Cover one nostril with your thumb.
Inhale slowly through the other nostril.
Switch nostrils and exhale slowly.
Continue switching nostrils until you feel relaxed.
Clothes Dryer Exercise
This fun exercise helps kids focus and relax.
How to do it:
Have the child sit with their feet crossed.
Place their index fingers in front of their mouth.
Take a deep breath through the nose and then exhale slowly through the mouth.
As they exhale, have them move their fingers as if they’re turning them in a clothes dryer, listening to the sound of their breath.
Pre-Exam Relaxation Exercise
This is a simple yet effective exercise before exams.
How to do it:
Encourage the child to sit comfortably in the exam hall and focus on slow and deep breathing (inhale and exhale).
Ask them to relax their muscles, especially their neck, shoulders, and back.
Then, have them imagine themselves answering exam questions calmly and confidently.
Steps in the Sky
This exercise helps children relax using imagination.
How to do it:
Have the child close their eyes and imagine lying in an open space.
Ask them to imagine clouds in shapes they like.
Then, have them imagine climbing a ladder made of clouds, relaxing with each step.
They can even imagine building a small hideout between the clouds for a sense of comfort.
Deep Breathing with Props
Simple tools can make deep breathing more fun for kids.
Using Bubbles:
Blowing bubbles slowly is a playful way to practice deep breathing.
Ask the child to blow bubbles slowly, which helps them take deeper breaths.
Using a Stuffed Animal:
Place a stuffed animal on the child’s belly while they lie down.
Have them inhale deeply to lift the animal and then exhale to return it to its original position.
This strengthens belly breathing.
Using a Pinwheel:
The child practices breathing out slowly or quickly using a pinwheel.
They can choose the method that suits them best.
Using a Feather:
Pick a colorful feather for the child.
Inhale deeply and hold for three counts, then exhale gently, blowing the air upward or downward onto the feather.
This enhances deep breathing and encourages focus.
Crafting with Breathing
Creating art with breath can help improve deep breathing.
How to do it:
Use a half paper plate or crepe paper strips or ribbons.
Ask the child to decorate the plate.
Let them blow on the materials while taking deep breaths, making their artwork move with their breath.
Deep Breathing Exercises Using Shapes and Imagination
Triangle Breathing
A great exercise for improving focus and relaxation.
Method:
Start at the bottom left corner of the triangle.
Inhale for three seconds while following the first side of the triangle.
Hold your breath for three seconds while following the second side.
Exhale for three seconds while following the last side of the triangle.
You've completed one deep breath!
Square Breathing
An excellent exercise to encourage regular breathing.
Method:
Start at the bottom right corner of the square.
Inhale for four seconds while following the first side.
Hold your breath for four seconds while following the second side.
Exhale for four seconds while following the third side.
Hold your breath for four seconds while following the last side.
You've completed one deep breath!
Star Breathing
A fun exercise that children will enjoy, involving tracing a star shape.
Method:
Start from any point of the star.
Move your finger along the "inhale" side of the point.
Hold your breath when you reach the tip of the point.
Exhale as you trace your finger along the opposite side of the point.
Continue tracing the star until you return to your starting point.
When you complete the star, you've taken 5 deep breaths.
Lazy 8 Breathing
A relaxing exercise that helps with stress relief.
Method:
Start with the number eight on its side.
Start from the middle and move to the left side of the 8 while breathing in.
When you reach the middle of the 8 again, exhale as you trace the right side of the number.
Breathing with Imagination
Use your imagination to create images that enhance deep breathing.
Flower Breathing: Imagine you're smelling a flower as you inhale, then exhale as if you're blowing out birthday candles.
Blue Sky Breathing: Inhale while imagining the blue sky, then exhale to push out the grey sky.
Balloon Belly Breathing: Imagine your belly is a balloon, expanding as you breathe in and contracting as you breathe out.
Soup Smell Breathing: Imagine you're smelling hot soup, then exhale as if you're cooling it down.
Darth Vader Breathing: Pretend you have a straw in your mouth, inhale through it, then exhale like Darth Vader.
Ocean Breathing: Imagine a wave rolling in as you inhale, then exhale as if the wave is rolling out.
Color Breathing: Inhale as you imagine a calming color, then exhale to imagine a color that represents letting go of tension.
Soft Belly Breathing: Tell yourself "soft" as you inhale and "belly" as you exhale.
Animal Breathing Exercises
Whale Breaths
An ideal exercise for relaxation and breath control.
Method:
Sit in a cross-legged position.
Sit up straight and take a deep breath.
Hold your breath for 5 seconds while counting on your fingers.
Then, lift your head up and release the air through your "blowhole" (as if you're a whale).
You can place your hands above your head to create a "blowhole."
Snake Breaths
A simple yet effective exercise for relaxation.
Method:
Inhale deeply.
Then, hold your breath briefly and exhale slowly while making a hissing sound. Try to keep the sound going for as long as possible.
Rabbit Breaths
This exercise can be done sitting or while moving.
Sitting Version: Place your hands in front of your chest to form "rabbit hands." Inhale quickly like a rabbit.
Movement Version: Start in a squatting position, then jump forward while taking quick rabbit breaths.
Bumblebee Breaths
A fun exercise that promotes focus and relaxation.
Method:
Inhale as if you're smelling a flower.
As you exhale, make a buzzing sound like a bee.
Experiment with different ways of making the buzzing sound, such as high or low, long or short.
Deep Breathing with Numbers
5-5-10 Breathing:
Inhale for 5 seconds.
Hold your breath for 5 seconds.
Exhale for 10 seconds.
4-7-8 Breathing:
Inhale for 4 seconds.
Hold your breath for 7 seconds.
Exhale for 8 seconds.
7-11 Breathing:
Inhale for 7 seconds.
Exhale for 11 seconds.
Counting to 10
A great way to teach children deep breathing using counting.
Method:
Inhale as you count to 1, exhale as you count to 2.
Inhale as you count to 3, exhale as you count to 4.
Inhale as you count to 5, exhale as you count to 6.
Inhale as you count to 7, exhale as you count to 8.
Inhale as you count to 9, exhale as you count to 10.
Body Breathing
Mountain Breathing:
Raise one hand, with the palm facing outward.
Place your index finger of the other hand at the base of your thumb and begin breathing while moving your finger up one side of your thumb.
Move your finger down the other side of the thumb and exhale.
Repeat the process with the remaining fingers.
Hands to Shoulders
An exercise to help determine whether you're breathing from your chest or belly.
Method:
While sitting or standing, place your hands on your sides.
Bend your arms at the elbows and place them on your shoulders.
Try to take a deep breath.
If you feel your shoulders moving too much, focus on breathing using your belly.
Rainbow Breathing
A fun exercise for children that helps coordinate breathing with movements.
Method:
Start with your arms open wide by your sides.
Raise your arms as you inhale, then lower them as you exhale, like forming a rainbow.
Volcano Breaths
An exercise that helps activate the body and restore energy.
Method:
Place your hands in front of your heart, with your palms touching.
Lift your hands upward as you inhale.
Then, move your hands apart and release the air as you exhale, as if releasing lava from a volcano.
Explosion Breaths
A great exercise for releasing energy and letting go of tension.
Method:
Start by standing up and slightly bending forward.
Jump up while spreading your arms and legs apart as you exhale.
Nostril Breathing (Kau-Bonja Breathing)
A calming exercise that helps focus the mind.
Method:
Close one nostril and inhale for 5 seconds.
Close the other nostril and exhale for 5 seconds.
Wood Chopper Breathing
A useful exercise for relieving tension and feeling strong and energized, mimicking the action of a woodchopper.
Method:
Stand up straight with your feet hip-width apart.
Clasp your hands and raise your arms above your head as if preparing to chop wood.
Slowly inhale through your nose as you raise your hands.
Exhale forcefully as you pull your hands down toward your legs, making a "ha" sound as you move, as if chopping wood.
Tips for Practicing Deep Breathing with Children
Be a Role Model:
The best way for your child to learn deep breathing is to see you practicing it daily. When they see that this activity is part of your routine, they'll be inspired to try it themselves.
Choose the Right Time:
Practice deep breathing with your child during calm times, like before naps or after meals. Make sure your child isn’t distracted or tired so they have the chance to relax and enjoy the exercise.
Create a Magical Space:
Children love magical places, so you can make your breathing space feel enchanting. Choose a comfortable pillow and add beautiful images, like trees or butterflies, to the walls to make the space fun. Your child will feel calm and relaxed as soon as they sit in this special place.
Don’t Be Pushy:
If your child refuses to practice deep breathing, don’t pressure them. Instead, offer something fun after the breathing, like playing or reading a story. If they continue to refuse, say "It’s okay" and get involved in something else. Give them space, and try again later.
Consistent Practice:
Deep breathing becomes a good habit when practiced regularly. If your child practices it daily, you'll notice that they become experts at calming themselves quickly when they feel stressed.
Incorporate Breathing into Play:
Even active children can benefit from deep breathing. Start with a few deep breaths, then make it fun by incorporating play. After playtime, do some more deep breathing. This way, your child will learn how to calm down after physical activity.